OCD for kids

One thing I didn't realise about young children until I had my own, is how they all (OK maybe not all - but a lot of those I now know) have a type of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)...

Exhibit A of this in our house is normally food related. Tonight the boys ate beef casserole (yummy), and I instinctively knew that Nathan would be far more likely to eat it if he could see what was in it - so I chopped the vegetables big so they were still recognisable; 'look - there's a carrot!'   I also knew he'd be more likely to eat the stew if I served it with some bread (cut into squares) on the side.  See, this is actually progress; Nathan used to only eat bread if it was cut into triangles...

Another example of this is that in our house, beans on toast isn't actually beans on toast at all.  It's actually beans next to toast, but in no way touching it - otherwise it is contaminated!

It's not just food either.  All manner of small, seemingly insignificant details can unsettle a young child.  Little breaks in the routine; parking the car in a different place to normal; misplacing a favourite toy; switching off the TV before the theme tune has finished; the list is endless.

Thankfully my older son (a wise old sage at 5) is now slightly more flexible than he used to be; but that might just be because I've learnt to explain things to him in a way that helps him cope with these changes.  I still say people are coming over at 4-ish rather than 4, otherwise he'll tell them they're late at 4.03!

Maybe we can all be a bit like this...  I dislike change as much (or probably more) than the next person.  It unsettles me too.  Maybe all being an adult is is learning to manage this sort of thing without having a break-down every time someone changes your sandwich filling... 

The 12 days of school term

On the first day of school term my young son gave to me: a lunch box full of debris

On the second day of school term my young son gave to me:
Two reading books
And a lunch box full of debris

On the third day of school term my young son gave to me:
Three party invites
Two reading books
And a lunch box full of debris

On the fourth day of school term my young son gave to me:
Four broken pencils
Three party invites
Two reading books
And a lunch box full of debris

On the fifth day of school term my young son gave to me:
Five gold stars!
Four broken pencils
Three party invites
Two reading books
And a lunch box full of debris

On the sixth day of school term my young son gave to me:
Six bags of haribo
Five gold stars!
Four broken pencils
Three party invites
Two reading books
And a lunch box full of debris

On the seventh day of school term my young son gave to me:
Seven jolly phonics
Six bags of haribo
Five gold stars!
Four broken pencils
Three party invites
Two reading books
And a lunch box full of debris

On the eighth day of school term my young son gave to me:
Eight bits of paper
Seven jolly phonics
Six bags of haribo
Five gold stars!
Four broken pencils
Three party invites
Two reading books
And a lunch box full of debris

On the ninth day of school term my young son gave to me:
Nine smily stickers
Eight bits of paper
Seven jolly phonics
Six bags of haribo
Five gold stars!
Four broken pencils
Three party invites
Two reading books
And a lunch box full of debris

On the tenth day of school term my young son gave to me
Ten new instructions
Nine smily stickers
Eight bits of paper
Seven jolly phonics
Six bags of haribo
Five gold stars!
Four broken pencils
Three party invites
Two reading books
And a lunch box full of debris

On the eleventh day of school term my young son gave to me:
Eleven writing homeworks
Ten new instructions
Nine smily stickers
Eight bits of paper
Seven jolly phonics
Six bags of haribo
Five gold stars!
Four broken pencils
Three party invites
Two reading books
And a lunch box full of debris

On the twelfth day of school term my young son gave to me:
Twelve un-named uniforms
Eleven writing homeworks
Ten new instructions
Nine smily stickers
Eight bits of paper
Seven jolly phonics
Six bags of haribo
Five gold stars!
Four broken pencils
Three party invites
Two reading books
AND A LUNCHBOX FULL OF DEBRIS!!!

Just keep swimming...

September is my husband Paul's busiest time at work.  He works at a university - and so the start of the academic year is insanely busy for multiple reasons.  It takes a lot of his time, and even more of his mental and emotional energy, so we're not seeing very much of him at the moment - and the bits we are seeing are the tired and slightly grumpy bits!

The same thing happens every year - so it's not like it's taken me by surprise.  However, every September, I gain a renewed admiration for anyone parenting alone for any reason.  How anyone manages to be a single parent, and still be able to formulate coherent sentences is beyond me - I take my hat off to you.

I'm trying to pace myself with all the jobs that need doing.  Gaining wisdom from the fountain of life that is 'Finding Nemo'.  When life is tough - I think we sometimes need reminding that all we have to do is just keep going.  Just keep swimming...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmyUkm2qlhA

It gives me hope that Jesus understood this feeling of general exhaustion.  In Matthew 11:28 it says:
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."  That's a promise I need to remember today.

We don't have to battle on alone.  God never promised that life would be easy, but He did promise to be with us every step of the way.

Hello Djibo, this is Rugby calling...

Something slightly mystical (OK - mystical to me) happens once you've been blogging for a month.  The good burgers of Google add a new feature to your blogging set up which enables you to find out all sorts of fascinating things; they call this bit 'Stats'.

For example, it tells me where in the world people are reading my blog - hence the title...  I have some friends living and working as missionaries in Djibo, Burkina Faso (Hello Mark & Cheryl!) - so I have a pretty rock solid idea that they are the Burkina readers...  However, amazingly - there's people all over the world reading my humble little blog.  Who are the people in the Netherlands / Italy / France / USA / Canada / New Zealand etc etc reading my blog?  How many countries can one blog get to anyway?

I can also tell you how many people read each blog post.  For example, the most popular one so far was 'So here's the thing...'  A blog about keeping romance alive in long term relationships.  I'll be writing more about that soon - so watch this space.

I even know whether people are using Windows, Macs, iPhones or blackberries...  I know - it's bonkers.  What am I supposed to do with all this information?  (Don't worry - I can't see what colour your eyes are, or tell what you're thinking...  Big sister is not watching you!) I have to confess to loving the fact that it all appears in pretty graphs and tables though; who knew statistics could be so addictive?

I would love to know where you are reading this - and who you are - whether you're somewhere exotic, or somewhere closer to home.  Please add a comment at the bottom (even if it's 'in the bath in Bognor!')

Oh - and Thank you to all of you who have clicked on an occasional interesting advert on my blog.  It does make me a few pennies, and I am very grateful. xx

Reasons to be Cheerful - 1,2,3...



I live with two of the most brilliant comedians in Rugby, or maybe even England.  The thing is - they are my children, and sometimes they're not aware of how funny they are.  I love the fact that they make me laugh every single day, and here are some of the reasons why:

1. Joel playing the guitar (attempting flamenco music!) - talking to Nathan playing the ukulele: "That's not rock music - that's just LOUD!"
2. Nathan's occasional mis-pronunciation of words: "Come on Mrs Harrington" (See previous post - Words)
3. In the garden recently - Joel comes running - "Mummy, Mummy - I've found a spider - his name is Henry!"
4. The way Nathan will not come and brush his teeth if you ask him too, but if you go into the bathroom without him, and start saying "Where's my Nathan - I can't find him - He must have gone missing" etc. He'll come running...
5. The way neither of the boys have realised the fact that the nightly 'Pyjama Race' isn't an exciting competition, it's just a cunning ruse to get them ready for bed.
6. The sound of them laughing
7. The stick game - How many sticks can you find to put in the green bin?  Current record: 164 (Otherwise known as a cunning plan to tidy up the garden...  I know, parenting requires an awful lot of cunning!)  This may turn into the leaf game over the next few months...
8. The simple joy of jumping - it just makes Nathan so happy. ("I'm jumping on the kitchen!"...)
9. Sweet Caroline (see previous post...)
10. Joel and Nathan's never ending encouragement - there's nothing more brilliant than being told you're doing well by someone too young to fudge the truth...

Fancy A Brew?

Over the weekend I was having a cup of tea with some friends, and they were surprised to hear that I only started drinking tea at university. 


I did my midwifery degree at the University of Central Lancashire.  Up until this point I'd lived in Buckinghamshire, so moving to Preston was a bit of a shock to the system...


We spent a lot of our first year doing placements with community midwives.  It was at this point that I discovered how truly devoted people from Lancashire are to drinking tea.  After being asked: "Fancy a brew?" in every house we visited at least ten times every day, I realised I was going to have to start drinking tea if I was ever going to fit in! 
I only discovered the Lancashire Hotpots today, thanks to my friend Sarah - this song is a homage to the tea drinkers of Lancashire...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aM1jQ8cIFuU&feature=related


I'm off to make a cuppa xx

If you're happy/sad/excited/cross and you know it...

Yesterday I wrote a Facebook status about listening to my younger son Nathan wandering around the house singing 'If you're happy and you know it - clap your hands'...  Most people who commented just thought it was cute, however - my sister (her with the nearly PhD) commented that although she appreciated the cuteness, she didn't really like the song.

Her issue with it was - what are the miserable kids supposed to do?  Fake it?  I can see her point - and actually someone from the BBC must agree with her, as on a Cbeebies episode of 'Something Special', they sang the song, but then added 'If you're sad and you know it - cry and cry', 'If you're cross and you know it - stomp your feet' and 'If you're excited and you know it - jump about'.

It got me thinking - this could be a guide to life.

Join in everyone...

If you're happy and you know it - clap your hands.
If you're happy and you know it - clap your hands.
If you're happy and you know it, and you really want to show it,
if you're happy and you know it - clap your hands.

If you're bored and you know it - read a book.
If you're bored and you know it - read a book.
If you're bored and you know it, just remember not to throw it,
If you're bored and you know it - read a book.

If you're angry and you know it - count to ten.
If you're angry and you know it - count again.
If you're angry and you know it, and you don't want to explode it,
If you're angry and you know it - count to ten.

If you're stressed and you know it - phone a friend.
If you're stressed and you know it - phone a friend.
And you might find it's not all that bad in the end,
if you're stressed and you know it - phone a friend.

If you're wiggly and you know it - do a dance.
If you're wiggly and you know it - even prance.
If you can't sit still for toffee, or you've just had too much coffee,
If you're wiggly and you know it - do a dance.
 
If you're indecisive and you know it - do them all.
(clap clap, read a book, count to ten, phone a friend, do a dance)
If you're indecisive and you know it - do them all.
(clap clap, read a book, count to ten, phone a friend, do a dance)
If you're indecisive and you know it, and you just don't want to blow it,
If you're indecisive and you know it - do them all.
(clap clap, read a book, count to ten, phone a friend, do a dance)
 
If you're tired and you know it - go to bed... xx

The Best Brownies in the World??

A long time ago - I did promise to discuss the 'Best Chocolate Brownie Recipe' so I thought the time had come...  I have been talking about exercise a bit, so I thought it must be time to redress the balance!! :)

This recipe was given to me by my friend Rachel, but I can't recall where she got it from:

Rachel's Brownies

Ingredients:
150g unsalted butter
200g plain chocolate - chopped
175g caster sugar
1tsp vanilla extract
3 large eggs
75g plain flour - sieved
100g white chocolate - chopped
100g milk chocolate - chopped

Instructions:

1. Melt the plain chocolate and butter in a bowl over boiling water
2. Mix in the caster sugar and vanilla extract
3. Whisk in the eggs, one at a time until all combined
4. Add the flour - beat until smooth
5. Stir in white and milk chocolate chunks
6. Pour mixture into 20cm square baking tin
7. Bake for 30 minutes - Oven temp should be 160 (or 140 if a fan oven)

So tasty - and gorgeous when still warm - especially with some nice ice cream...  Yummy. 

Try it out, and then let me know if you'd change anything.  Oh, and don't let them near anyone doing Weight Watchers, they're probably a gazillion points each...

The List

One of the great things I've been able to do now I'm not working, is help out with a small discipleship group at our church.  This cell group has some very beautiful 16 to 18 year old girls, and it's been a joy getting to know them, and walking with them through some of the joys and trials of being a teenager.  It's also put some things from my own teenage years into a new perspective.

We talk about all sorts of things: life, learning, God the universe and everything really.  We also spend a fair amount of time talking about relationships.

One story I've told them recently, is about something that happened to me just over ten years ago...

It was the summer after my first year of university, and I was spending the day with Cath, one of my old school friends. Cath wouldn't mind me telling you that she'd had a very bad track record with men;  habitually attracted to the bad boy who would behave badly and treat her even worse.  It pained me to see her hurt - again.

I concocted a plan.  I got her to write 'The List'.

This list was to have all the characteristics she wanted in her next boyfriend on it.  The main part of it was full of non-negotiables, the things that weren't up for discussion.  Then at the end, she added a few preferences... 

She felt a bit daft writing it, so I (happily single at the time) decided to write a list too.  I made it comically specific:

1. Male
2. Christian
3. Aged 20-25
4. Caring
5. Secure in himself
6. A bit taller than me - maybe 5 foot 10
7. Brown, curly hair
8. Brown eyes

The funny bit, and the bit my youth cell like, is that I met Paul (super husband) the very next day.  Paul, who happened to fill all the criteria...  Every single one. 

Now I know there's nothing magic about writing a list like this - of course not.  And I know that sometimes the people we marry aren't always 'our type'.  I would have still married Paul if he'd had different colour hair (!)...  I still think it's a good idea to think about what you really want in your partner, and then stick to it; it might help in relationship disaster prevention!

Cath, my lovely school friend, now has a lovely list-fulfilling husband of her own, and a beautiful new baby too.  It's amazing what can happen in ten years, isn't it?

Sweet Caroline

Those of you who know me well, know the truth about me.  I'm not a lean, mean, cycling machine; more like a wobbly, knobbly, cuddly mummy.  I feel I need to start with this fact - as I'm going to talk about going cycling - again.  I've confessed in a previous post (See 'I want to ride my bicycle') to being pleased about having finally found a form of exercise I enjoy; but to be honest - the main motivation has been having Joel master cycling over the summer holidays, and him wanting to practice his new found skill.

We went out today, on a mission to cycle round Draycote Water.  This is a local reservoir (the same one mentioned in 'One to One time') which is about five miles round.  This time we took a picnic (vital fuel for the intrepid adventurers), but we also took our new piece of cycling kit.

Our friends, the lovely Diane and Aaron, had passed onto us a tag-along bicycle attachment their sons no longer need.  This adds an extra seat, pedals, handle-bars and a third wheel to my bike, making it really quite long.  It opens up the possibility of cycling together as a whole family, as Nathan's only just mastered pedalling, and doesn't yet have the stamina to keep up with the longer legged members of the family.

I have to admit to being a little dubious.  Nathan is a wiggly child, and I wasn't sure he was going to be able to sit still, let alone for long enough for us to get around the reservoir.  So I decided to have a little chat with him about it before we set off.

We stood together looking out the back door, watching Paul assembling the tag-along.  He listened as I explained which bit was Mummy's seat, which was Nathan's seat, where he would hold on etc. etc.  I asked if that sounded OK to him.  He thought for a couple of seconds with his serious face on, and then replied that he was happy to go for a ride on Caroline.

Caroline?

I checked that he understood.  I know that Caroline is the name of a car in Thomas the Tank Engine stories, so I wanted to be sure that he understood that we wouldn't be driving round the reservoir...

He understood completely, he had just named the tag-along! 

And so it came to pass that we gained a member of the family.  I then had tantrums to deal with as both Joel and Nathan couldn't ride on Caroline at the same time.  In fact, one of us will probably have to take Joel out on it (sorry, her) later in order to keep the peace.

Our trip around Draycote Water was a storming success.  Joel managed to cycle all the way round.  So did Paul & I, and Nathan and Caroline were a beautiful, if slightly wobbly couple.  A picnic lunch had never tasted so good.

If I do manage to get fit, it won't be down to my efforts or discipline; it will be down to the boys harassing me for rides on Caroline... :)

Dance like a kid

I was feeling a bit glum earlier on having heard some sad news...  (Nothing major - so don't panic!)

It was then that I heard some exceedingly raucous laughter coming from my lounge.  Both my children have brilliant laughs - especially when they're uninhibited, and not being watched - It's one of the best sounds in the world.  I walk in, to discover the boys are having a silly dancing competition - taking turns to dance, and being awarded points for their efforts.  They are laughing and laughing - and (for once) it actually doesn't matter who has the most points.

Then the inevitable happens.  Nathan loses interest, and so Joel asks me to take Nathan's turn.  Well, what could I do? 

I give it my best shot.  Somewhere between the twist and the hand jive, with bonus points for pulling a silly face at the same time.  These things are less embarrassing if you throw yourself in whole-heartedly.  In fact, I discover that I'm really quite good at it.  So good that Nathan decides to join in - and so Joel gives us the best score so far: 9 out of 10...  Bruno Tonioni would be proud. 

And actually, I guess I win really.  As there's no room for being sad when you're dancing like a kid.  I think I knew this before - but sometimes you just need the encouragement to give it a try.  Go on, I dare you.
As Chris and Pui would say: "Show me show me your groovy moves!"

The mobile phone saga

I'm not a technophobe, but I'm not a techie either...

Over the Bank Holiday weekend, my mobile phone was playing up.  Some of it's functions were working fine - but it was stubbornly refusing to receive any text messages.  This was a bit of a nightmare, as I tend to organise my (& the boys') social life via texts...

I tried getting people to reply to texts I sent - but this didn't work.

After talking to my husband (who is several degrees up the techie scale from me) I tried deleting some messages to make sure there was space to receive things.  Deleting messages one by one from the inbox takes an unbelievable amount of time, and I couldn't just delete the lot as I needed some of them.  I barely scratched the surface of my inbox if I'm honest.

I then hit upon the master plan of deleting my Sent Items.  I even worked out how to delete them all by only pressing a couple of buttons...  (I know - I'm a genius!) My phone - bless it - then proceeded to delete them, one by one, all by itself, all 2648 of them.  This, as you can imagine, took a few more ages...

After all this space saving, my phone still didn't want to play.  I was mentally bemoaning how everything seems to break when you haven't got the money to replace it.  I was working out where to purchase a new hand set...

And then, super husband (he really is a genius...) remembered the golden rule of all electrical equipment, the first commandment of anything with batteries, the mantra of anything technological:







If it doesn't work - switch it off - then switch it on again.

I am happy to say that the phone is now healed of all it's ills. Fourteen text messages then staggered into my inbox having been running round the ether, and I''ve saved a few quid.

I'll remember what to do next time! :)