Enforced Stopping

It's been a while...

We've been really fortunate with the absence of illness recently.  I'm hoping it's a benefit of having had every known bug known to man in the first few years of my parenthood.  Maybe, now we're not so sleep deprived, we don't have to incubate every illness we come across.  That's an encouraging thought.

It couldn't last forever though.  The night before last, I awoke to a vague whimpering sound.  As I came to - it was apparent that Nathan had also recently woken up.  Poor chap had woken up lying in his own vomit.  His main concern was being so cold.

So - saving you any more unpleasant details - the rest of the night was no fun.  Suffice to say - little sleep was had, and much laundry was created.

Nathan's school has a policy that following this sort of bug, you can't go back until you've been vomit free for 48 hours.  All fair enough.  Yesterday Nathan was not too bad, but today he's pretty much back to normal.  He's downstairs playing with some toys as I type.

And actually I'm grateful.  Here I am - having to be at home - doing enforced stopping.  (I'm also grateful that my children are now old enough to at least attempt aiming their vomit into an appropriate receptacle - although I did promise no more unpleasant details...)

Don't get me wrong, I've spent a lot of time doing housework, and other jobs.  However, I've also been building marble runs, playing dominoes, driving cars, being read stories (Nathan very rarely lets anyone read to him at the moment, but he does like an audience for his reading...) and sitting with him on the sofa.  Nathan is a very companionable chap.

So I'm not rushing off to do x, y and z today.  I'm off to chill out with the boy xx

The Questions people ask...

When you enter the 'both children at school' phase of life, people ask you some marvellous questions... 

"What do you do all day?" (Probably the most common - I'm not going to rant - but it's safe to say; I'm not just sat on my rear watching Daytime TV...)

"When are you going back to work?"  Because combining shift work with the school run is just so much fun...

But my personal favourite:

"Are you going to have another baby?"

Seriously?

I have to get over my initial urge to just laugh maniacally.  No, I'm not.  If I was going to do that - I would have done it already; not waited until I had a bit of spare time - and then filled it with morning sickness, more stretch marks and additional sleep deprivation... 

Any of you who have ever read my blog know that I love my children a lot; after all - I talk about them enough.  They are marvellous, brilliant, funny, bright, insightful, *insert additional superlatives here* But I still don't want another one.

One of my good friends is pregnant at the moment with her second baby, and she's really struggling with her pelvis.  I had some pelvic problems; particularly in my second pregnancy; so empathy is not a problem.  Watching her struggle to move around, I can almost feel that pain again.  I know that, even amidst her pain, she is not regretting being pregnant.  I'm glad that I'm a bit more available to help; having kids at school does release you a bit to do other things - even if that is to help others with their babies...

So, dear reader - I am quitting whilst I'm ahead.
And if I ever feel the need to cuddle a baby - I'm sure I'll be able to find one...

Harvest Festivals - the Trilogy

This morning I went to my third and final Harvest Festival of the year.  Once your children get to school, you don't do these things once - oh no...  once is for wimps!

The first of these was Joel's.  Years one and two in school trek off to the local parish church; sing some songs, and listen to a chat from the vicar there.  All good fun.  I particularly enjoyed not having a squirming toddler on my knee.  In years gone by, I have been the parent chasing a wiggly and noisy toddler about whilst everyone else is trying to hear their pride and joy say their one line in the school production.  It was nice to not have to think about taking enough toys / snacks / nappies to get through thirty minutes, plus the always-longer-than-you-think waiting for something to actually happen time.  I also particularly enjoyed the kids singing 'Cauliflowers fluffy'; with additional dance moves.  Marvellous.

The second Harvest Festival was actually a harvest / thanksgiving / 1st birthday service at our church (how's that for multi-tasking?!)  Our congregation have been meeting in the local primary school for a year now.  It was a good chance to celebrate all that has happened over the last year; and to thank God for all He has given us individually and corporately.  We did this through the medium of huge ice-cream Sundaes, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, singing, bacon sandwiches and prayers of thanks chalked on the playground. We have learnt a lot over the past year, and look forward to what God has for us in the years to come.  I'm sure God would have us dream big dreams for our future together; after all, as Bill Hybels would say: "The local church is the hope of the world". 

My third and final part of my Harvest Festival trilogy was this morning.  The Nursery and Reception age children aren't traipsed down to the church - they do their celebrating in the school Hall.  They all came in wearing headbands with certain vegetable pictures attached; Nathan was a cabbage...  They told us the story of Oliver's Vegetables; where a small boy searches his Grandad's vegetable patch in the hope of finding some potatoes to make some chips; in the process, he finds lots of other vegetables, which of course turn out to be very tasty...  My favourite part of the proceedings had to be the rousing rendition of 'Big Red Combine-Harvester'.  They were brilliant.

So what have I learnt from my Harvest Trilogy?  Well, I've certainly learnt that it's hard to pick songs that are perky tunes, fun for the kids and that actually thank God for the amazing things he gives us.  What's your favourite harvest song?  My personal favourite is probably 'Blackberries in the Hedges', but no-one around here seems to know that one...

Also, and I know this makes me sound old, but there is always something to be thankful for.  I think whether it's the joy on a child's face as he sings, the fact that you don't have to worry about wiggly toddlers, or something bigger like the sun and the rain that help things grow.  God has given us so many things, and I think it does our perspective and mental health endless good to be grateful.  Life might not always be easy (I know, no surprises there) and I'm not advocating pretending life is all shiny when it isn't; however, I know I'm more likely to be content if I focus on the multiple blessings from my heavenly Father than on the things that bug me, or that I don't have.

Today, try to cultivate (ooh, appropriate gardening term alert... pleasing!) an Attitude of Gratitude.  What are you thankful for?

School days

So it finally happened...

I remember, back in the haze of exhaustion of looking after a toddler and a baby, I foolishly calculated how long it would be before my boys were both at school.  It was a long time away; I must have been crazy to even think about it at the time.  I think sleep deprivation makes you go a bit bonkers.  Don't get me wrong, I love both my kids very much; but during the relentlessness that is parenthood with tiny ones, I briefly looked forward to the halcyon day when someone else would be responsible for them - if only for a portion of the time...

We're now over half way through Nathan's second week at school.  How did that happen?  The baby mentioned above is now a truly handsome four year old.  Astounding.

He's enjoying school.  I know it helps that he's been going to the school each day with Joel for longer than he can remember - in fact when Joel was in Reception, Nathan used to cry each morning because he wasn't allowed in!  Nathan also did his Pre-school year at the School's Nursery; so he's feeling pretty at home.  He knows about half of his class already; so I guess it's just like he moved room for him really.

It's going to take a while to build up the stamina for school though.  They're all a bit tired out by doing five full days.  According to their super-TA, one of them fell asleep yesterday afternoon during their story time.  Ah well, I can think of afternoons when I would happily do the same.

So, to my lovely friends still battling the baby / toddler phase.  It really does go faster than you think.  Enjoy your little ones.  Nathan's still little really; in comparison to Joel (he's 6 going on 36) - who's coming home full of details of the scientific experiments they've been doing, and asking me ever more difficult questions such as "why can't you see gravity?"...

Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think...

One to one time...

The sun shone today (hoorah!), and so the boys and I took the chance to go cycling at a local reservoir.  Joel (son number 1 - aged 5) and I set off together, leaving Nathan (aged 3) to pootle along at a slower pace, with Daddy for company.

We managed about 3 miles all in all, which I thought was quite impressive.  Maybe another day, with a bit more planning, and a lot more food, we'll actually make it the whole way round.

I realised whilst we were out, how little time I spend one to one with Joel, and it got me wondering how common our approach is.  When Joel was small, it took both of us to look after him; although there were certain vital functions only I was equipped for.  Then when Nathan came along, we tended to aim to divide and conquer - I tackled the baby, Paul tackled the toddler - after all, Joel wanted as much daddy-time as possible, and I was still feeding Nathan, so the roles were pretty obvious.  We've pretty much kept things this way round though; me looking after Nathan, Joel with his Daddy; I guess the system wasn't broken, so we never tried to fix it.  After all, there are many times when we (particularly me) look after both the boys.

The thing is, now Nathan's old enough to be keen on Daddy time too.  In fact, he's quite a man's man.  If there's one solitary Dad at a park or soft play centre, he'll seek him out for a bit of manly interaction.  He likes to chat and pass the time with any man who'll listen to him.

Today made me realise how important it is to swap our natural roles around occasionally.  Joel and I cycled further than we ever could have done with Nathan in tow.  We also chatted about school, his friends, the universe and everything really.  Nathan got some well deserved Daddy time too, and I'm certain he will have loved it. 

Difficult though it can be; I'm sure it's worth blocking in some one to one time with our children.  I think it might be the thing that helps me get to know them best.  What do you think?